Thursday, October 30, 2014

BIGFOOT HUNTERS: RICK GUALTIERI




BIGFOOT HUNTERS: rick gualtieri

WOO HOO, DUDE!!!! One more day and you're golden!!!! But you gotta get off the tricycle and stop riding it in circles around the house! Yeah, I know that you’re going trick or treating as Damien and getting in some practice! And, yes, I do remember when the toddler Antichrist plows into Lee Remick and sends her tumbling off over the balcony, but you’re wearing yourself out!!! There’ll be nothing left for tomorrow night!!! You’re panting like a dog and what the heck is that smell? Wait is it me? *sniffs under my arms* Nope! Is it you? *sniffs under your arms* Nope!!! Then where is it … coming from *notices open window* Oh, my God, it’s coming through there! And that howl … why, I think it’s … it’s … BIGFOOT, dude!!!! And right on time for our Daily Book Giveaway!   

Who better to show up and play guest host than the awesome BIGFOOT!!!! I mean, there are legends, and there are LEGENDS, and BIGFOOT is one of the latter!!! Like Fox Mulder’s poster said, I WANT TO BELIEVE! and courtesy of the fantastic Rick Gualtieri you will!!! He’s coughing up ONE PRINT and THREE ECOPIES of his awesome, HORROR-ADVENTURE, action-packed thrill ride bigfoot hunters!!! Camping trip? Kids? Woods? Monster? Are you getting the picture?!!! And what could be more fun than kids getting decimated by a mythical creature? NOTHING!!!

Of course, Rick just had to put up a fight!!! Why, why, why?!!!! It just brings out my scary side and I do bad things … very bad things. Since he wouldn’t listen to reason, I brought out Tessie … my trained anaconda!!!! Well, SEMI-trained, anyway!!!  She sometimes listens and sometimes doesn’t!!! Don’t think it’s as much obstinacy as that one bad ear she has from me hollering at her!!! Anywho, I let her out of the van I parked in front of Rick’s house and let Tess slither on in!!! She applied the kind of bone-crushing pressure only she knows how to apply!!! When he cried “uncle,” I came rushing in and told her to stop, but she didn’t listen … or couldn’t!!! It took a truckload of chicken breasts thrown in the opposite direction to get her off of him!!! But he was fine!!! Don’t know why he was complaining so much!!! I mean, cracked ribs don’t take that long to heal!!! Just tape ‘em up and wait three months and you’re done!!!

So if you want to have some fun under the covers (Hey, hey, hey!!! Mind out of the gutter, peeps!!!) Click on over to the Official FB Event page and comment “I WANT TO WIN” in the OCTOBER 30th DAILY GIVEAWAY POST pinned to the top of the page and you just might!!!! Also add in which format (print or ecopy) you want or just say “BOTH!”

I’m amending the rules so that you can use weapons that cause blunt force trauma!!!! Just my way of saying thanks!!!! Good luck to you all!!!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
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Rick Gualtieri lives alone in a dark, evil place called New Jersey with only his wife, three kids, and countless pets to both keep him company and constantly plot against him. When he's not busy monkey-clicking out words, he can typically be found jealously guarding his collection of vintage Transformers from all who would seek to defile them - Defilers Beware!

His upcoming works include:
HALF A PRAYER (The Tome of Bill, part 6)
DEVIL HUNTERS

Visit him at:

Or just drop him a line at rickg.author@gmail.com.

Don't be shy. Unlike the creatures in his novels, he doesn't bite. :)


BIGFOOT HUNTERS
h
“Rick is an exceptional writer with a real knack for flow,
description and characterization.” – The Indie Bookshelf
(theindiebookshelf.blogspot.com)

Evolution is about to be kicked in the teeth by some very large feet.
When Harrison Kent suggests a camping trip to the dense forests of Colorado, his friends are all eager for a little adventure. What awaits them, though, is far more than they ever bargained for.

They learn that Sasquatch is real, but these are not the shy creatures that legends speak of. A madness has claimed them, erasing their once peaceful nature and leaving in its place a ravenous horde of monsters that's about to descend upon the unsuspecting residents of a remote town.

The bloodthirsty beasts are not the only secret the woods hold, however. Help is on the way from an unlikely source. If Harrison and his friends can survive long enough, they might just be able to even the odds and reclaim mankind's place atop the food chain.

************

Bigfoot Hunters is 90,000 words of graphic Horror Adventure (mature audiences only) by Rick Gualtieri, author of Bill The Vampire and Scary Dead Things.

Includes the bonus short story, Zombie Pride, by Thea Isis Gregory.

CONTEST CLOSED -- WINNERS POSTED ON OFFICIAL FB EVENT PAGE!!!

TO ENTER

1. Simply click on link below (HALLOWEENPALOOZA PIC)
2. Comment "I Want to Win" on the October 30th Daily Giveaway post
3. That's it! All names will be put into Random.org at 8 PM this evening. Winners will be posted on FB! 

GOOD LUCK!!! 

h

2 comments:

  1. It's okay. It only hurts when I laugh...or breathe...or try to keep living. :)

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    Replies
    1. That's the spirit! Tessie just got carried away ... :)

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